A Cruel Illusion
by scriptor nocte
Summary: Written for Golden Queen week prompt: Regina likes it when he touches her, it makes her feel loved Basically a smut and angst fic about the darker side of the Rumple/Regina relationship. Not flluffy. Warnings: slightly dub-con and emotionally cruel Mentions of Regina/Leopold


**Written for: Golden Queen prompt: Regina likes it when he touches her, it makes her feel loved**

**Rating: M (for smut and angst. Also slightly dub-con depending on how you look at it)**

**Author's Note: Golden Queen, but definitely not fluffy or sweet in any way. This is a darker fic focusing on the crueler side of their relationship. Rated for smut and angst.**

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Regina likes it when he touches her. It makes her feel loved.

Even when it's like this. Even when he has her trapped between his body and the wall, forcing his hand beneath her dress in ways that make her gasp and squirm.

"Hold still, Regina," he hisses into her ear as his hands trace their way up her curved figure until they come to soft breasts.

It hadn't started out like this. At first the touches had been gentle. A brief brush of fingertips. The way his hand guided hers when brewing potions. But she had wanted more. Regina had instigated it. They had just finished one of their lessons: she had finally mastered a spell that allowed her to spy on others through mirrors, when she kissed him.

"Careful, dearie," he had whispered. "Little girls can't handle monsters."

"I'm no little girl," she had said back. "And I think I know quite well what I can handle." And he had taken her right on there, on top of his wooden desk. And although he was by no means gentle, Regina had felt loved. It had been so long since she had been loved. So she kept coming back and begging for more.

Rumplestiltskin's hands now travel from her breasts down to the place between her thighs. His fingers spread her apart and run through the evidence of her arousal, of her submission to him.

Regina can't help but grind herself down onto his hand, but he is quick to pull away at this moment of disobedience. "I thought I said no moving," he says with more force this time.

"I'm sorry, Rumple. Please, I'm sorry," she cries out. She needs his touch again. These rough moments that are only about sex to him are about so much more to her. Because without it she feels abandoned. Lonely. Unwanted and unloved. Like how the King makes her feel when he looks right through her. Even how Snow makes her feel. Because no matter how much Snow insists she loves her stepmother, Regina knows the girl would trade her for Eva in a heartbeat – just like everyone else would too.

"Suck," Rumplestiltskin commands as he presses his soaked fingers to her lips. He doesn't need to ask twice. Regina eagerly opens her mouth and cleans his fingers with her tongue. She swirls it over the tip of his fingers and then moves to pull him in farther into her mouth. They slide in all the way down to the knuckle before she releases them with a pop and presses and devoted kiss onto his still hovering hand.

"That's better." Rumplestiltskin has moved his hand down onto his belt buckle now. He carefully undoes the buckle and pulls down the zipper, releasing himself.

It's taking all Regina's self-control to keep from thrusting herself back onto him. She can't afford any more delays, and disobeying him will ensure just that. She needs him to be inside her. So she waits until he's ready and takes her from behind in one simple motion. He begins to thrust against her, gripping her hips so that she's forced to move with him.

"What do you think he would do, Regina? The King. If he knew that I fucked his queen. And that she begged me for it, no less, the eager whore. Do you think he would have you beheaded for treason? Or would he even care enough to do anything."

Regina chokes back a sob at his words. They both know the King couldn't care less about his new wife. She was merely a trophy for display. A toy to be played with. And if news of this treason ever reached his ear, she shuddered to think, he wouldn't care enough to save her life. The law would demand her head, and her head it would have.

"Please Rumple, don't talk about him. Let's just focus on us." Rumple laughs at her remark, his thrusts becoming harder and faster as he reaches his climax.

"Us? Don't fool yourself into thinking this is a relationship, dearie."

Her tears are real now, she can feel them pooling in her eyes and it takes every ounce of strength to keep them at bay.

"I love you, Rumple," she admits. Face coloring with shame. "Please, I love you. You make me feel loved; and wanted in a way that he never does. I would do anything to earn your love, Rumple. Please."

He starts to giggle now, unable to contain himself.

"Love you? How could I ever love someone as broken and pathetic as you?"

His words wound her and now she's sobbing. But it feels oh so good when he finally comes inside her and pulls a climax out of her at the same time. He pushes her away when he finishes and she falls to the ground at his feet. And then he turns and just strolls away, still laughing to himself over her foolishness.

Regina's entire body racks with sobs. She can't find the will to drag herself off the floor so instead she curls up on her side and hugs her body for protection. How could she fool herself into thinking he could love her? She should know well enough by now that no one would ever love her. He is right, she is broken. Broken into so many pieces that no one cares enough to glue back together.

But the next day finds her back in his castle. And when he pulls her away from her work station into a kiss she can't resist him. His touch makes her feel loved. And even if that feeling is just a cruel illusion, it's worth every moment she can get.


End file.
